Some women choose single mamahood. For others, single mamahood chooses them. In my case, it happened to choose me. Life has a special way of giving you exactly what you need even if it’s hard to see at the moment. Six years ago, if you were to have asked me whether I thought separation and, later, divorce would somehow be one of the best experiences of my life, I might have laughed through the tears and the heavy heart that I was carrying. To be honest though, not much time had to pass before I started seeing the silver lining of all the pain that I was feeling. With each person that showed up for us and how fast my wants were aligning with reality, I knew that I would be alright.

Reflecting back on this journey, I clearly remember how in my darkest moments, I would surprisingly receive words of encouragement and support from either a friend or an acquaintance that did not know exactly what or how I was even feeling. I remember when I felt alone, there was always a nudge from the universe to remind me that I was most certainly not. Whenever I shifted perspectives for the positive, things fell into place and I felt like the light at the end of the tunnel was visible.

As I think back, I ask myself, how or why did I decide to be so open about my process… if I was not blogging, I was posting on IG about my single mama bump and toddler. I wore my heart on my sleeve. I cried whenever and wherever I happened to be, letting it out, baring it all. It was not until later that I realized in doing this, it made it all real. It allowed me to accept, to feel, and to move on. It empowered me.

One of the best things about my journey so far is the community and the village that I have nurtured. It goes without saying how instrumental my village has been…my family and friends supporting my singlemamahood and entrepreneurship dreams. Surprisingly though, this experience has also fostered a sense of community among other single mothers. I have had so many amigas reach out, sharing their own heart break, their challenges, asking for advice or simply asking for an ear. Knowing that you can lean on someone that might have an idea of what you’re going through means a lot. I am far from an expert, especially when it comes to the struggles and woes that parenting can sometimes bring, but I do know how solo-parenting can sometimes be a hard pill to swallow.

This dream of ours… to build a safe space for families where the idea that “it takes a village” is at the backbone of our everyday, is one we hold dear because it hits home. The purpose of Lola & tots is to provide a nurturing balance, a reliable sense of support you can fall back on. This is why we are fundraising… to help a few single mamas within our community with care and co-working in order to take the edge off of the balancing act. As we gear up for the holiday season, I hope you’re inspired to contribute to another one of our goals… one that you can rest assured will be appreciated because as we all know, community carries us through.

Learn more about our single mama fundraiser here. And check out how it started and how it’s going down below!

xoxo

Natalie